Sterling Archer got his name~

It was the last day of our time together and we had a plan for "healthy celebrations and endings".  The girls were sad that it was their last day and my co-facilitator and I felt that too.  One of the things we did was choose a card from "The way of the Horse" and one of the girls read it.  We began outside, but had to move inside because of the shorter daylight in October. When we went inside, the girls saw our new colt in "Sorrel's" stall.  It had been his stall for  all of his 20 years at our farm and his name plate was right there. Which brought up the topic of this new little boy's name.

In the summer and fall of 2010 In the Company of Horses had a group of girls from two group homes come to learn by way of the horse, things like; how to get along with others, how to ask permission and be grateful, they learned about positive body image and enjoyed the freedom to dance with horses uninhibited.  They learned about themselves and universal truths outside of themselves. And along the way they experienced the death of my first horse and the addition of our new colt.

As one of the girls went on reading aloud from the book, another laid across the stall door snuggling with our P.R.E ( Pura Razza Espanola)  colt.  It was quite comforting for everyone as I'm sure they fell asleep together.  When they awoke, some 20 minutes later; the troubled and youthful sixteen year old girl proclaimed, " I know his name".  Curiously, I asked "What is it?" She said "His name is Sterling because just like when you get your ears pierced you get sterling silver posts, because you will never get an infection and he'll never do you wrong."
Well that sounded right to me!

This little horse seems to be wise beyond his years (ha! months).  He knows things, like how this sixteen year old girl who stood 6 feet 6 inches tall needed to cuddle with him on her last day at the farm, he did not judge her because of her family situation or the way she looked or talked. I'm sure he enjoyed what she offered to him as well, unconditional acceptance, a warm and undemanding welcome to his new home.  He doesn't mind being alone and he also likes to be together. He does have a Sterling character and his color is dark gray for now.

His papered name is Valiente Silver Cross Wind.  He came with the nickname "Bogie" which is fitting because of his confidence and air of maturity, named after the actor Humphrey Bogart; suave, debonair. Sterling Archer was a natural progression coming from my Son who knew right away he needed the rest of his name from a comic character Sterling Archer.  He has a gleaming smile and will also "Never do you wrong".

This is Sterling in his stall; He can just fit over the door! 

A family learns by way of the horse

A Mom and Son came to work out an issue they were having in the arena.  Mom teaches yoga and wants her son to have his own yoga practice, which at 10 years old, does not appeal to him.  Son is a football player and looks like one!  They tell us that they have agreed to just do 5 sun salutations every day together, but they never have.
So we send them on a task to use the things in the arena together to "create" a metaphoric place where they will do yoga.  They use all of the hula hoops and make a free standing sphere.  Then we asked them both to go get a horse of their choosing and bring the horse to the yoga place.
Son was doing a lot of talking and bribing and coaxing with the pony.  Mom seemed to just go over and then her horse followed her to the yoga place, then the pony came over to be with them!  The son asked, looking astonished, "How did you do that?"
So we (the facilitators) asked Mom, How did you get these horses to come with you to your yoga place?
She explained that she was taught to greet each being with an open heart, so she went over to the big chestnut thoroughbred opened her heart in a greeting and invited her to join with her heart and she accepted, then the pony just joined in with them.  
We asked Mom, "Where did you learn how to greet each being with an open heart?"  Mom replied that she learned  this from her long time yoga teacher.
This is what she wanted for her son.  While he did not readily agree to have his own yoga practice, he saw how his Mom's practice gave her something special that he wanted.

It was a simple session, but profound. 

Universal truths.......... timeless, without boundaries.

Here in NJ, I felt the spring come in a few days ago, maybe as much as a week or so. If you follow this blog, you will surely notice its new look!  I love winter and snow, so I'm satisfied now. I think that is why I love spring so much and when it comes, the changes are everywhere.  I think that rain we had the other day was telling. Then the peacocks, their feathers are long and gorgeous.  They loose their tails in the fall and spend all winter growing them back, they are like a calendar dancing around the yard. They start to fuss at the feed bowls in a new way.  In the winter, they are just happy to eat, in the spring, they dominate the bowls  arguing with the rooster, and even the hens want to tussle with each other.  Feeding time is quite a lively time that takes on a whole new life in the spring just like everything else.

 Sterling, my lovely Andalusian boy is growing and changing every day.  He owns his seat at the table if you know what I mean, which for a 9 month old, I'm impressed by!  He is kind in every way, smart and thoughtful, and happily I have not seen signs that he is "interested" in the girls. I find great joy in watching the horses interact and I learn much about leadership and living together, waiting with patience. As Sterling makes his way into the hearts and minds of  his band of mares, I'm drawn to thinking about the rhythm of life and the universal truths all around us.

Feel; timing; balance.

• Music - Listening to the quality of the spaces between the notes or playing the long note..........
• Painting something - A portait or a barn; Painting it thick, thin, one coat or many, combine colors? Brush, roller, feather or rag; maybe a sponge or a leaf, maybe fingers. 
• Making  love - I remember hearing an interview with Carlos Santana where he explained to all the ladies in love with him that "I cannot do to you what my guitar does to you", soft or firm, slow or faster, the first time;  the last time. But we look for that, that universal truth of feel. We all innately know it when it's right. 
• Driving a sports car - or a big rig, feeling the flow of the road, traffic, the engine when it's asking to shift, be the grace of a pick up as you down shift before the curve and apply just the right amount of gas to stay in the curve, a well oiled machine.
• Building something - With integrity, that works, that looks good, that lasts, smell the wood, sand it smooth, feel the engine purr when it starts for the very first time. 
• Baking something - Choosing the perfect ingredients; organic grown to perfection added at the perfect time. Feel the batter, know when it's perfect, inhale deeply to know when it's done. Find the sweet spot! 
• Practicing yoga  - Strong and slow, hold and let flow, the breath in and then out
• Walk - Feel the Earth, placing your feet one after the other in rhythm, like a dance. Smell the land, the pavement, the leaves or the water, feel the wind on your skin, drinking it in.......
• Swimming - immersed completely, breathe through your mask at 30 ft., snorkel just under the surface, backstroke on top of the water with ease and timing, rhythm and relaxation.  Feel the water cradle you. Catch a wave and stay on top; or ride in the middle or just dive underneath. 
• Stargaze  as the moon rises and flows across the sky, then disappears  into morning when all the flowers open up to gather the sunshine. Sense the changes when they come, feel the winter, smell the spring, languish in the long days of summer, rejoice in the blaze of autumn colors. 
• Ski with the mountain.
• Dance by yourself to the music in you; Dance to natures music all around you; Dance with someone else; be willing and brave enough to lead and be led. Feel the rhythm find the sweet spot. 
• Ride a horse: let go and ride forward and back; up down, over under, through...........
  
  Add yours......

Opinion ~ January Mark Rashid Workshop

I happily traveled in the back seat of the truck while my friend who was going to ride in this workshop managed all the driving and the co-pilot; the navigating.  I even had a nap! It was about an 8 hour drive to the therapeutic riding center in Mebane NC where the clinic was being held.  Monday night was a farmhouse conversation where it seemed that the theme of Mark's teaching was unfolded.  Feel.

 It begins in the mind with a thought and then mirror neurons do the work of transmitting that thought.  We all have these mirror neurons, just look around and see how everyone does what everyone else does and we don't even know we are doing it or why! You know when you finish your long time partner's sentences and you begin to look like your dog.  We think we are different and suddenly what we like; have; do is popular.

Mark practices Aikido to stay centered and balanced.  That is a physical as well as emotional description of his way of being with the horses and the people at the workshop. It seems that this is the way he puts feel into words so the intellectual mind can understand it. I might also say, the woman's inquiring mind can hold it.  There were a few men in the room and none had questions or needed more than one demonstration.  While some in the room could not understand the concepts, everyone could feel them.

The format for Tues and Wed was 3 riders in the AM; 3 more riders in the PM. There was one thing everyone was taught; the back up with feel mostly through steady pressure.  Everyone showed up in the arena prepared to ride in the outfits of their chosen disciplines, Endurance, Eventing, English,  Western, Dressage The first lesson was at the mounting block for a horse who could not keep his feet still so the rider could mount.

Marks maturity as a teacher showed through over and over.  It really was all about what the rider wanted in conversation, but what the horse needed in deed.  The lady who was having trouble at the mounting block asked Mark to hold her horse while she got on.  He said he would do that or if she would like, we could just fix the problem and have the horse stand there on his own. Choosing the latter the lady stood back while Mark approached and stood on the mounting block.  He simply showed the horse what he wanted by moving him to where he should stand. This took about 15 minutes and then the owner did it herself and mounted up.  Day 2 the little saddle seat rescue knew just what to do and so did his person.

I noticed time and time again in Mark's maturity as a teacher, when the student explained that their trainer taught them to do "it" this way, he just showed them another way with no judgement, sarcasm or derogatory comments about anything.  He told me later that people just want help.  That's it. I noticed that he did not share his opinions about bits or bit-less headgear, spurs or not, shoes or not, saddles or not, or any of the other judgments and opinions that were clearly running through my mind.

Then I read a bit of his book "Whole Horse Whole Heart" It's his newest one.  I don't own or have not read any of his books, so I thought if I was going to buy one it should be the newest one. Right there in the beginning he muses about a dream that seemed to keep him awake about the Grand Canyon.  What was stronger the river or the rock. As he went on about that, he realized that it doesn't matter.  Like all the questions in my mind about saddle fit and rider position, they don't matter if the rider can actually hear their horse.  Are we listening to what our horse is telling us. His goal is to teach us to listen to our horses, feel them, feel for them. If we do that , we will fix all the other things.

I can't say I learned anything new about technique or strategy, but what I did was experience a seasoned, educated, balanced teacher, who made a difference for every horse and rider combination. I'm very particular about where I spend my training dollars and who's influence I allow into my horsemanship.  For sure I left trusting this teacher and I will ride with him when the opportunity is right.
   

The uncomfortable place of misunderstanding............

Earlier this week, I broke out my long lines to see if I could help Moses relax with lots of bending from the ground.  Much to my surprise, he seemed to have experience with this type of driving. So we moved to exploring; just what did he know?  I discovered right away that he was worried about the lines flipping over his back from behind, so I did this excessively in motion all the while letting him know not to worry, using my voice to make soft noises of approval when he relaxed. 


 I asked him to follow the feel on the halter. He had trouble following the feel when I was on the left wanting him to follow the feel to the right.  He wanted to look at me, but with a tap of the line on his cheek he quickly learned that was not the answer. I have finally learned, that it is better, just to go there! Make the correction quickly and clearly, just like the lead mare does. 


I had the perfect example shown to me by Valentine and Jessie when they first got to co-mingle with Moses (on purpose!) in the field.  We were all there, all the mares and Sterling too, I was cleaning as usual and playing with horses when I got bored with the cleaning. I let everyone in quietly, without a fuss.  I noticed earlier in the morning Mo and Valentine seemed to be interested in one another across the fence so I knew it would be a good time to bring everyone in.  Valentine is my lead mare and Jessie is the enforcer, but she honors  Valentine's lead and they are usually together.  


Without looking at or acknowledging Moses at all, Valentine went straight to grazing.  Jessie and Moses both turned butts to each other and tucked under and I  thought they were going to kick each other.  Then they didn't ~ Hmmm. Then with just a cock of her ear in his direction, Valentine double barreled him! I heard Whack.  She was back to grazing only one heart beat later. He was looking at her like a little puppy dog seemingly apologizing for being in the way, and only moments later, they were touching noses and that touch ran all the way to the flank.  Lovely example of Love language and leadership.  Firm fair and friendly. 


So that was my goal when Moses did not follow the feel on his halter, but wanted to turn and face me.  Touch quickly, firmly and go back to grazing, so to speak. Like Valentine, I was sure this was the best way to get through this uncomfortable place of misunderstanding.  Unlike Valentine, I needed to repeat this lesson a time or two during our session! Soon enough, he was asking me questions about the quality of his hind quarter yield :) So we quit for the day, friendly confident and happy.


It was two days later when we revisited this lesson and gratefully, the yields were soft and way better than how we left off! We have been making a habit out of approaching one another with our necks relaxed and body language soft.  I go out several times a day to give Moses a piece of carrot, just to reinforce the relaxation.  I go up to him and crouch down in front of him and encourage him to come get his carrot.  At first he would come right into my space, not asking permission to share the space, but taking it, so I needed to send him away.  But as the days went by and our lessons progressed he realized the price for the carrot was to come in relaxed, respecting my space and asking politely. 


I wasn't sure a couple of days ago if this horse was going to be a reliable riding horse for his owner, and I'm still not sure, but I was encouraged yesterday by the shift in him.  I think he is having congruent conversations on all fronts, even Mya, my little 30 inch tall mini mare, tells this dominant horse where to be, then she leaves him alone until he asks politely.  


Once again, it is my honor and privilege to live, play and work In the Company of Horses..........

Claiming space and playing with food ~ Moses~

Moses came in yesterday for 30 days of training.  The owner says he's dominant and she is not always comfortable in his space.  He has kicked her and intimidates her.  So when he got here yesterday, I let him investigate the space at liberty for awhile.  He displayed his dominance to my herd from across the fence as I observed. That looked like posturing, tossing his head and rolling repeatedly.   After awhile I took him with halter and long line to the field where I hoped he would stay during his time here.  I showed him around and simply claimed the space around me and my projected path.  We stopped at every fleck of hay and I shared food with him.  Calmly with controlled energy and excitement, we explored the space.

While Mo's attention was on everything, he had an ear cocked on me the whole time.  When he got fixated on something in the distance, I thoroughly got invested in whatever it was as well, then decided, like a leader, that nothing was wrong and we should move on to the important work of investigating the new space.  When his head was below his withers, and he was blowing and looking for grass to chew on, we went into the round pen and I removed all strings.  He was very connected to me, following me wherever I went feeling like a herd of two.  So we picked up the pace trotting together.  Without looking at him I could feel his head come up above his withers, so I came down to the walk making my circle much smaller so as to keep the walk and continue to slow down.  As soon as he looked at me, I invited him in.  Rinsed and repeated until he was able to trot with me without his head coming up.  That happened through walk, trot, stop transitions.  It took about 20 minutes and I opened the gate and we went out.  I was hoping he wanted to go to the water trough to drink; instead he went to the water trough with me and got interested in where the girls are.  Then he went to the creek and was very interested in crossing.

Now if he had gone down the bank and crossed the creek, he would have been out in the general population with my herd and on the track of my paddock paradise.  I did not want this to happen.  So I observed for the better part of an hour and made the determination that he would cross the creek if caught up in enough excitement and given the dominant tendencies I have already witnessed, I was sure he wanted to go cavort with the big girls.  So I put up an electric barrier where I thought he would cross, thinking it was done.

He went back into the round pen and rolled repeatedly, violently, I suspected he had some discomfort and he began to paw at the ground.  I've seen this horse show signs of colic in a situation where he was worried.  So I put his rope on him and took him; keeping the belly of the rope on the ground, once again, to the water.  He checked it out but did not drink, so we went to see if he wanted to stand on the tires.  When he got focused on the task at hand he did lots of licking and chewing.  It was a nice connection, so while he was still on the tire, I took off all strings and left him alone. He showed no signs of discomfort.   I went to get him some hay.  When I arrived in the field with the hay, I was immediately accosted for the food, he ripped it right out of my hands.  Hmmmmmm another sign of dominant behavior, claiming the food.

With no fuss, just noticing, I walked away to get my stick.  Now prepared, I was very clear about claiming the hay.  I did not touch him, just claimed the hay, like I have seen other horses do countless times.  When he looked at me longingly, questioning, I picked up the fleck of hay walked it over to him and I walked away.  I did that a few more times, all the while being clear, fair, friendly and unwaivering in my intention to claim the food. He responded with more and more respect each time.

With only one more short session online for the day, just asking him to lower his head in motion and relax, I considered the day a success.  Then came the first night.

Earlier in the day I noticed that Mo and Summer seemed to like one another.  So as the light of the day waned, I had a thought that I did not listen to.  I should leave Summer in the field with Moses.  It may not be enough that the whole herd is just on the other side of the fence on the track, eating hay next to him.  So, at 2AM I am woke to the sound of rolling thunder.  It sounded like it was just rolling around the house.  I went out and found the whole herd in the front lawn including Moses! I have no idea how he got out of the field and onto the track with everyone. So by the time I got out back to see if anyone was left (only Sterling - Yelling for the herd) the thunder rolled right up to me!  Lots of energy and I'm pretty sure there was not a bit of moonlight.  I got a rope and went in and put it on Moses, then took him out to the space just behind the barn, Summer happily came with us.  There they were quietly together for the rest of the night.........

All in all a very interesting first 24 hours!

Stronger than any halter and lead rope!

Whispering Jessie, really understands what stronger than any halter and lead rope means.  Thank goodness she's teaching me!  Jessie is my dominant mare, really the only one I would classify that way out of 7 mares and 1 stallion.  Today I had yet another example of how my dominant mare keeps the order in her herd.

So, it's pouring out, not cold but windy and sideways rain, lots of it.  All of the horses were tucked inside the outside shelter, mostly wet because the rain is coming from the South.  I think it would be a nice idea to go out and bring them all into their barn, cozy, dry, more room, hay, you know comfy.

 I go out, prepare the barn make my way through the driving rain to the gate, get Jacquie's attention, and run back to the barn expecting everyone to follow.  I'm in there waiting and waiting, I poke my head out and I see Hearty, Jessie and Jacquie half way to the gate looking at me dressed head to toe in rain gear, I'm sure they can't hear me calling them because the gale force wind is blowing my voice to the county north of me, but they see me for sure waving at them to come in.  Now these horses come into this barn once every day to eat.  They love it, look forward to it, I've watched them waiting to come in and eat day after day, year after year for 20 years; rain, snow, wind, thunder and lightning, sunshine, night, every type of weather condition, they come in.  But, they are looking at me then back at the shelter, I'm thinking they are coming, I run back in to get ready to receive them, and they don't come!  I look back out and they are now all back in the shelter! I'm wondering what's stopping them.

So I get a halter and lead rope and go back out into the torrential and driving rain, now soaked in spite of my rain gear, and Summer sees me because now they are all stirring.  Gratefully, she chooses to come in, then the migration begins, so I get back to the barn to get everyone where they need to be and just like every other day every horse is waiting outside the barn,  at the doorway, waiting for their herd leader Valentine to enter first.  The ducks, chickens and cats all make way and in perfect order everyone files in; calm and quietly going only where they are suppose to. First Valentine, then Jessie, Patches, Summer, Hearty, the little ones, and lastly Sterling. It occurs to me that all along they were waiting, waiting for valentine to make the move to the barn. More important than comfort or food; the safety of the herd leader saying lets go.

That Jessie, she is not only a beauty, but a gift!